Coaching in Analogies #19: Sand, pebbles and rocks
One theme has come up in almost every coaching engagement I’ve had: the leader’s time and attention are their most important resources. Safeguarding these resources is some of the most important foundational work a leader can do. It’s also never been harder.
Say yes to everyone, or allow yourself to be pulled away by every distraction, and you’ve got nothing left for your own objectives. Become a professional hermit and devote yourself to Cal Newport’s Deep Work, and you’re missing the important human elements of the role.
Think about a table in front of you, with a large mason jar, a pile of big rocks, a pile of pebbles and a pile of sand next to it. All of these things were once in the jar, and it’s your job to put them back.
The order matters.
If you start with the sand, you’ll end up with no room for the big rocks. Same for starting with the pebbles. You have to put the big rocks back in the jar first, followed by the pebbles, followed by the sand. The smaller elements fit around the bigger ones.
Think about how this goes in the world of work. Do you ever open a browser to do something specific, only to find yourself scrolling Twitter or Instagram a half hour later? Think of how hard it is to get back on track afterwards. This is what happens when you let sand into your jar first.
Same thing for the leader who can’t seem to get any work done because their calendar is booked with meetings with other people all day long. You could simply log back in for a couple hours at night after the kids go to bed, but that’s like letting your work day spill past the top of the jar! Instead, I talk to leaders about blocking out time for their important priorities first, and letting others take time slots for meetings after. The big rocks go in first.
Longer days and less time off will be a temporary fix. This isn’t a sustainable approach in the long term -- in fact, it’s a recipe for burnout. You have to protect your time and attention by using them more wisely.
Make room for your big rocks.
Coaching prompts:
Which big rocks have you had trouble making room for in the jar of your time and attention?
Could you use a little less sand in your life? What would that look like?
(Note: This analogy was made popular by Stephen Covey in two of his best-selling books. Its origin is unknown.)